Credit where it's due

I don't think I've ever been to Wood Green in north London. I know, however, that my credit card has. It was there last month spending more than £400 in a High Street store. I have become a victim of "identity theft". I do, of course, still have my identity so it's more accurate to say that I'm a victim of identity sharing, which is like filesharing only more expensive.

It was my credit card company who informed me. They phoned last month to tell me that someone with an East End address (I live in south east London) had added themselves to my account. They didn't think this fraudster had carried out any transactions but they turned out to be mistaken, as I found when my credit card bill arrived.

So I complained about the fraudulent charges, filled out a form and waited for a response. Today it arrived: since both the card and PIN were present at the purchase it was a genuine transaction, writes the credit card company sleuth. Followed by, and this is the good bit: "Given that there is no other evidence of any fraudulent activity on your account, we feel sure that the PIN has not been compromised..."

No other evidence, Sherlock? Apart from the fraudster who added himself to my account, you mean?

I'm no expert but I think I can also tell you why the card and the PIN were present at the transaction: BECAUSE YOU SENT THEM TO HIM.

The fraud department is closed at the moment. They work from 9-5, which is terribly convenient for me because I work from, oh, 9 until about 7.30. Thank god fraudsters keep office hours, or we'd never catch them.